Brushing the dirt off my shoulders (no relation to Jay-Z)

Wow, so it's been about 9-10 months since I last posted...
I guess in the course of living life, doing things, being busy, etc, I just never found the time to articulate the daily ups and downs of life, an exercise which has always been fruitful for me personally. Sometimes I wonder whether blogging is a therapeutic activity in itself or I just do it just because it passes the time. Maybe it doesn't matter?

Oh yeah, back to updating you all (however many that is) on my life.
This is currently my last semester of college, but whereas some would become emo with the end coming so soon, I just see it as a sign of big things happening. It's funny, in the next 3-4 months, I'll be graduating, getting a new car and getting a new phone (still deciding between the iPhone, Blackberry Bold and the Samsung Omnia). My classes are good; I'm taking two Poli-sci classes by the same Professor from whom I hope to get a recommendation letter, and my third/last class is hip hop music and culture.. so school wise I can't really complain. KCM is good and church is good as well.

I guess something I really want to share/celebrate about is I guess God finally answering my almost 2-year old prayer request in finally ending my prolonged bout with PMS (post-missions syndrome). After I came back from Uganda heading into my junior year, I just seemed to lose all that passion, energy and motivation that really characterized my sophomore year. I went from reading and praying daily to going through the motions for the last year and a half. But I don't know whether it's the fact that it's my last semester of college or because the new years freshness, but I feel all of that energy and motivation again. It's really manifested in all areas of my life. At home, I'm slowly, but surely learning to be a better brother/son and letting my relationship with my family be led by the spirit. At school, I go to class, take notes, study with really crazy attentiveness.. I actually enjoy studying and reading for my classes (granted one of my classes involves me listening to Dr. Dre's The Chronic for homework). I feel that my relationships with friends and people at school are improving that much more. I feel so much more intentional about being a small group leader, senior accountability leader, etc. Most importantly, I've found myself in 2009, reading and praying multiple times a day, like it's breakfast, lunch and dinner. I've recommitted myself to my old bible reading plan as well as picking up some C.S. Lewis on the side (The Weight of Glory that is). It really feels like sophomore year all over again, which leads into...

My desire/decision towards going out with KCM missions this summer, which would be my second time. The strange part is, I knew I wanted to most likely go out to missions this summer, but I always leaned towards going with church (55 to 45). Call it stupid if you will, but it's my gut instinct. I don't know whether it's the fact that my church's steady program will always be there even after college, or whether the new STSM directors have a completely different curriculum for STSM this year, but in the last two weeks, coinciding with I guess my recent revival, I've done a "about face". The one thing that makes me hesitant and still praying about is that I'm not going merely for "going for the experience".. I want to be sure that my heart is in it for God. I wish I could say it was through a crazy series of divine revelations and events that I now am leaning towards going with KCM. But it's not that crazy at all. I guess if anything, it's just a feeling of God, through my newfound joy/motivation, tugging me towards going out again. If anything, me going out this summer would be everything coming full circle. How the events are transpiring now are eerily (or divinely?) similar to my sophomore year, which was the first time I went out with KCM. That year, as this year, I've decided or leaned towards going out on STSM very early on. And just like two years ago, I've felt this undescribable joy/energy that's leading me towards something grand. But yeah. At the same time, I'm still praying because I know plans can change.. I've seen too much during college to not be ready for the unexpected.

What countries am I interested in, you ask? Well, I've always learned to take the STSM's announcements at UR with a chunk of salt. Just as reference, they listed Australia as a possbility at UR last year, but I can't help feel that this year is going to be huge. Huge in trainees, teams, leaders and most importantly countries. So far they've tentatively (highly subject to change) listed Japan, China, Russia, India and Uganda as possible destinations. I guess, as of right now, my top 3 choices (in order of preference) would be Japan, China, and Uganda.

But yeah, if you happen to be reading this for whatever reason (God bless you by the way, I don't think I would ever read this much for anyone), please pray for me that if I do go out, it'll be for the right reasons.

Whew.. I think that was a big enough update/post for now.. but yeah, I hope I can definitely post more often than I have before. Anyways, I've got church early in the morning and some deuces I gotta drop so I'll end things here for tonight.


- BH